How we look at life has a major impact on whether we’re generally happy or unhappy. When filled with negative thoughts and beliefs we naturally become unhappy with our lives. The good news is, with practice, you can change your mindset.
1- Do you get angry when your expectations are not met? Much of our mindset consists of expectations, what we believe we deserve and what “should” happen. Do you find that you’re usually angry with yourself for not meeting your expectations and angry with others for the same reason? That probably means you’ve set your expectations too high. And that’s good news since we can always work on ourselves but have little success changing others. If you have unrealistic expectations for yourself and those around you, you will likely not be happy with your life.
To change this mindset, learn to evaluate your expectations. Do you expect what you hope will happen or what you think “should” happen? If the answer is yes, try to think about what is more reasonable and realistic for you and others to accomplish.
2- Do you mostly focus on things that are wrong or not working? A sure sign that your mindset needs a shift is when you continuously fix your attention on the disappointments, the letdowns, or the failures in your life.
To change this mindset, learn to think about the things for which you are thankful in your life. Write them down and keep a gratitude journal if need be. This will help to keep the negative thoughts from dominating your perspective.
3- Do you focus on those things over which you have no control? Doing this contributes to having feelings of helplessness and hopelessness.
To change this, learn to tell the difference between those things that are in and out of your control. Once you accept what you can’t change, you will be better able to begin to change those things over which you do have control.
4- Do you usually see yourself as a victim? Doing so hinders your
ability to change things and create a better life for yourself. Additionally, seeing yourself like this can lower your self esteem and make you feel as if you have no control over your life.
To change this, recognize that bad things happen but that you can change things to lower the possibilities they will happen in the future. Begin to feel empowered and use that power to control what you can control.
Changing your mindset certainly isn’t easy, but it is one of the most powerful things that you can do for yourself. Learn how to recognize when you have a negative mindset and make the necessary changes to become more positive.